Do you ever *wish* you could say what you are feeling or thinking but with words that genuinely describe how YOU think, feel, and believe?
Self-expression, Sharing, and Public Speaking can tap into my old friend, Anxiety IF I allow it. Why? My child-self holds the belief she is not worthy of being heard because she was taught to believe she is unintelligent.
For a child experiencing severe sexual abuse, lasting changes in the brain and nervous system create barriers to processing information. These barriers can present as anxiety, depression, worry, and more, leading to poor concentration/memory and possibly physical illness. Of course, the child is unaware of this connection, so as they mature into adults, core areas of their lives are affected such as social, emotional, financial, sexual physical, etc. Awareness and Discernment become clouded with fear-based efforts of the child-self to “keep the secret or suffer the consequences.”
As a child, I was conditioned and cautioned NOT to express myself. It wasn’t that I couldn’t Understand lessons as a child or in later years. I learned to “Believe” I was incapable of Understanding, creating barriers to learning.
Each day I write and attempt to describe sufficiently how I feel, think, or believe; however, I was frequently left wanting for a more meaningful expression with words that hold Power and meaning to me. That is UNTIL I connected to Understanding how I can train my brain to update my beliefs.
Society is ego-based, where appearances carry more value than words. We don’t want to appear to be different or less than “enough.” It’s my opinion we place too much value on what others believe, not what we individually believe or feel. This doesn’t leave much room for authenticity. A lack of self-honesty, NOT vulnerability was a major contributing factor to my anxiety and depression.
Sharing my experiences is not a matter of telling my story for the sake of being heard or accepted by inner work and healing circles. It’s not to be recognized as a courageous and strong woman who vulnerably shares her story. My intent is not to influence the ego or beliefs of others. It is to express my experiences in ways that I feel connected to and Understand myself first, and if others connect or resonate with me, that’s a MAGICAL gift from the Universe to both of us.
Why do we believe it’s necessary to remain within the limited confines of the language of others? Who’s to say we cannot create and define words to express our lives, much like we draw or paint what we feel or see?
“When we learn to access authentic self-expression, we can connect to ourselves and others through Understanding and Awareness fostering Post-Traumatic Growth.” – The Moreness Chronicles
I have the power to step outside of the self-imposed limiting beliefs — beliefs I accepted to be true from others. It’s a matter of what and whom do I Choose to believe? Do I believe I can draw a Square-Circle (as everyone else believes they can), or will I open my mind, body, and spirit to express the fullness of Me?
We define ourselves. We Choose what we Believe and how to write our conceptions of self. We can write our Dictionary-of-Power using the words we individually Choose to genuinely describe how we think, feel, and believe.
I don’t need to *wish* I could say what I am feeling or thinking. The Power of Choice gives me that ability by accessing the colors I desire to paint my portrait of self-expression.